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Writer's pictureCarol Korenowski

Pain Unseen

Updated: May 16, 2023


Pain affects mental health

Pain, throbbing, stabbing, pinching, burning

Agonizing, suffocating, tormenting, punishing

Exhausting both body and mind

Bodily trauma can be terrifying

Interventions bring fear and invasion

Problems spreading

Unexplainable aches

Injuries that won’t heal

Suffering outliving physical recovery

Some pain resides

in the mind and emotions


Sometimes pain allows you to forget

distract

cry

hide

numb

fight

flee

freeze

collapse


Sometimes pain pushes you to accomplish more

or forces you to do absolutely nothing

stops you from doing the thing you most want to do

or the thing you didn’t want to be doing anyway

isolates you

or allows you to remain attached

confirms your negative beliefs

or forces you to reassess and reassign value

not to approval, ability, or perfection

Sometimes pain teaches you

to prioritize compassion

people

family

character

effort

internal validation

good enough


Sometimes your body feels the pain of fear

shame

guilt

anger

hatred

sadness

despair

apathy

desire for comfort

empathy

care

attention

help

All the things your body needs

to feel loved and accepted


Sometimes our past wounds

neglect

abuse

bullying

abandonment

rejection

Link to the new pain and activate

begging for deeper healing


Thank you body for telling me I’m hurting

Thank you for remembering the pain I endured

and the healing I still need


Come talk

feel

sense

be with me

Therapy can help

Slowly, with patience

honor

dignity

agency

trust

curiosity

awareness

acceptance

tolerance

regulation


It’s okay to feel the sensations of the body

Lean into the pain

momentarily

temporarily

with support

Trust your body

The feeling isn’t trying to hurt you

It’s just communicating

Sending a message

Asking for something

Telling you something

Here’s my unmet need

Meet it for me and relieve the responsibility

of the part who uses pain to protect you


When we learn the wound your pain seeks to heal

We can understand what your body is doing and why

identify and fulfill the unmet need

in healthier ways


Be free to enjoy

move

walk

run

dance

swing

stretch

play

compete

and exist outside the world of

where would you rate your pain

on a scale of 1 – 10?



Carol is a psychologist and the founder of Therapy Alberta, a private group practice with local psychologists, social workers, and counsellors offering individual, couples, and family counselling and therapy in Calgary and across Alberta.

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